Wednesday 25 May 2016

My Short Story

For this piece of writing I have focusing on my vocabulary and punctuation. I have been learning to:

  • Use a range of precise vocabulary to communicate meaning (Year ⅞)
  • Use all basic punctuation independently and attempt more complex punctuation (EG semicolons, colons, parentheses) (Year 7/8)
The pieces of my writing that are highlighted green are where I have shown my vocabulary and punctuation goal.

The night at the concert.....


The room lights up sparking into the clear blue sky , the weather is perfect nothing could ruin this evening

The screaming get louder than before, suddenly the room erupts with screams as Taylor's shadow appears.

She soon heads on to the outdoor stage as my friends and I clutch our Taylor Swift 1989 t-shirts and scream crazily louder than before.

She is wearing a sparkling jacket, black top and blue skirt. The room falls silent as she speaks into the microphone.

“Welcome to the 1989 world tour” She  announces.

Everyone in the room screams louder.

The first song I will be singing is Welcome To New York!” She says.

Furthermore she soon starts singing the audience falls in love singing along and gilding their banner and signs.

My long blond hair dangles along my face  as I sing along crazily. The evening is going perfectly nothing could ruin it.

The room lights up as she kicks off Blank Space.

I stare at my two friends Libby and Nadine as they rise up and down crazily singing along.

She soon procedures  to Out Of The Woods , my friends and I sing louder than ever.

“Are we Out Of The Woods yet, are we Out Of The Woods, are we in the clear yet, in the clear yet, good” She sang.

Suddenly the first crackle of terrifying thunder hits the perfect sky. The crowd's screams in fear as heavy rain pours down.

Taylor keeps singing a few more lines, until the weather is unbearable and the thunder blocks out her voice, rumbling through the sky.

“My keds!” Nadine sobbed   eyeing her shoes.

“Sarah what is happening” Libby asked me but her voice is drowned out by the powerful thunder, lightning and rain.

After a few more minutes of whined conversation , Taylor appeared to speak in the microphone.

“The rain is nothing, yet it is inconvenience, but a bit of singing will fix that…. She gets cut off.

She tried to strum her guitar and sing the first few lines of clean.

“The drought was the very worse, When the flowers that we’d grown together died of thirst.” Taylor sang.

Everyone in the outdoor stadium forgets the rain ; I fall in love with the music, she starts the chorus.

"Rain came pouring down when I was drowning that's when I could finally breathe" She sang.

But the rain smashes again harder than before and no one can heard Taylor.

The  concert is soon evacuated, my friend and I head out in horrid.

"I'm so distressed my one and only chance to met Taylor is ruined" Nadine moaned miserly.

" I know my brand new Keds are ruined, I brought them specially the concert!!!" I moaned as the rain poured down.

"Hey you girls Taylor wants to talk to you” A voice says behind us, well I think it said because The rain is so intense.

“Really” I say my voice full of excitement.

“Yeah follow me” The manager guy says dully.

But…..But I thought the concert was……evacuated?” I say questionly?

“Taylor instead the tea party was still on” He communicates.

We follow after him through to the grand backstage area .

Taylor herself was standing there grinning ; wearing a black dress.

“Hey girls, you are invited to the tea party” She says.

Since I am starstruck I just stand there in awe.

(The tea party is a party at all Taylor Swift concerts and a few people get selected to net Taylor)

We all scream in delight and hug her tightly.

She signs all five of our cds and shirts ; we take pictures smiling with joy.

As we are about to leave, Taylor stops us.

“Here are some VIP tickets to my concert next week” She says. “Considering your concert was never finished. We scream again, hug her tightly and bounce down the street full of excitement. Looking forward to the next concert.  


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